December 2011
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My house isn't necessarily the best place to be...
With all of the current family drama and everything. But it’s actually serious this time. I’d like to get away from all of the crying, please.
So if anyone would like to come rescue me and let me join in on their new year’s eve plans, that’d be awesome as fuck.
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You know you had a successful day when you went to bed at 5:30 woke up at 8:45 because you had a doctor’s appointment, then took a nap from 1 to 5, showered because you were going to see Sam then fighting with him and changing your mind, eating pizza with your niece, and then taking another nap from 8 to 12.
I’m thinking I might be up for a little while….
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Luicibnda ius my best frien deve.r besxides jesse. they a5re fuckomging right now . zine lov e everyiobe. xcerobin in sbeautiful.
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Last night was weird, but fun.
I would post about it, but it’s Christmas Eve and I have to be at my grandma’s in an hour. Maybe I will tonight when I get tired of all of the people in my house.
Explaining how a show went:
Everyone else: Oh, it was pretty cool. The band was sick. The crowd was awesome. I really enjoyed it, can't wait to go to another one.
Me: SWEET MOTHER OF GOD THAT WAS THE BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE I'M SOBBING THAT WAS THE BEST FUCKING SHOW EVER I'M SO HAPPY I COULD DIE I GOT BARRIER AND THEY LOOKED IN MY GENERAL DIRECTION TWICE THAT MEANS THEY LOVED ME THAT MEANS THEY'RE GOING TO AGREE TO MARRIAGE IT WAS LIKE GOD HIMSELF LOOKED AT ME I REMEMBER THE WHOLE SETLIST I GOT PICKS I'M SCREAMING I LOVED IT SO MUCH I LOVE LIVE SHOWS AND I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY PLAYED THAT ONE SONG WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT THEY PLAYED THAT ONE SONG I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY PLAYED IT I SCREAMED WHEN THEY PLAYED THAT ONE SONG AND OH MY GOD I WAS SO CLOSE TO TOUCHING THE LEAD SINGER YOU DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND I'M PRETTY SURE THE GUITARIST SWEAT ON ME HIS SWEET PURE BEAUTIFUL HOLY SWEAT FELL UPON MY UNWORTHY FACE JESUS CHRIST I'M NEVER SHOWERING AGAIN FOR I WILL LOSE THAT SWEAT OF AN ANGEL AND THE SMELL OF THE VENUE I LOVE EVERYTHING I'M SCREAMING PRAISE JESUS
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I hope things are beautiful. And if they’re not, then I hope you remember this moment right now when they are. Because you’ve got to hold up each and every other moment to the moment when things are beautiful and say “Look. I told you. Remember this.”
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Even if I wanted to forget you, everyone else...
There’s this guy, Jimmy, whom I’ve met twice when hanging out with Sam. He calls me from time to time wanting me to come see him, have his children, drink a few beers, etc. Now don’t get me wrong, but this guy isn’t attractive in the slightest. So even if I did want to be a bitch and fuck one of Sam’s friends to see how he felt about it, Jimmy would not be the person...
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I can't remember what it felt like to be in love...
I can’t sleep.
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